DUKE NUKEM 3D USER MAP TITLE:Bad Taste FILENAME:badtaste.map AUTHOR:Lincoln Lovelog (we have decided, how sad it is that others cannot appreciate our genius.) E MAIL ADDRESS:toopack@swbell.net MISC. AUTHOR INFO:Gee, let's see...I'm 23, a virgo, love movies, rave music, long walks on the beach, and...okay, seriously..... Contrary to popular belief, I don't artificially insemenate mountain lions. But, I love this damn game! (and i've never even played dukematch!) YET...BUT I WILL!!!! I'm a musician actually...In 2 bands: CLEANER:psycho retarded evil techno movie theatre music (kind of an industrial,rock sorta thing actually.. i'm just being stupid...and i write some of the lyrics!) CRACKHEAD:B-Movie techno industrial joy! ...Recently joined AFTERLIFE..more of that great heavy industrial sound that we crazy youngsters can't seem to get enough of these days..... any info on these bands or any other retarded things things you'd like to say can be sent to my e-mail address. info on AFTERLIFE at Andrew D. Phegely's homepage.(don't know address. search for Afterlife.) WE'RE DISCORDIANS! THE CULT IS GROWING EVERYDAY! ERIS IS THE CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE! OUR KIND IS ON THE WEB..JUST LOOK! oh yeah...I am asked to say the following: "WE LOVE DEFICATING ALL OVER THE PLACE IN PUBLIC RESTROOMS!" SEND e-mail for the info. of how to get a photo of Chicken Boy in doo doo action! He isn't joking. I've seen chicken boy piss everywhere in a QT bathroom. Claims he laid a turd in a paper towel dispenser once. Maybe you're the one who got it?! He's nuts...he shit in my friend's wallet and mailed it to him. (Stand back boy! this calls for devine intervention! I kick ass for the lord!) BAD TASTE title inspired by the glorious Peter Jackson film of the same name. This man is warped. I wanna meet him and see if the back of his head really opens up, but, i am afraid Chicken Boy might pee on Mr. Jackson's feet. He does that kind of thing you know. (Hell hath no fury like a hippo scorned) By the way...the whole ANC thing refers to a certain movie theatre..hint.. hint.. It's a big middle finger in their direction. These people treat their employees like shit. The only way to work in such a place is to lick someones asshole daily. I ain't gotta brown tongue baby, and I don't have time to follow the world's fucking rules. We're a bunch of freaks here i guess, but we don't suck anybody's dick for a paycheck. So...The next time you wanna go watch a movie, remember these magic words:FUCK THE AFOREMENTIONED THEATRE AND GO TO A DICKINSON THEATRE. They're much nicer theatres anyway. Please stick together on this and boycott the smarmy bastards! !!!!!!!!!!!!THEY SUCK!!!!!!!!!!!! (time for talkies.Now, what are you dirty Whores \pronounced hoo-ers\ doin' on my planet?!) DESCRIPTION:When I set out to build this level, I wanted to make it as nonlinear as possible, but still follow somewhat of a path. You can't just let someone walk right to the exit. Hopefully I've done my job well (like a true grasshoppa). If you end up at a subway stop and there is no subway car, wait, it is coming. I made only one car and a rather long subway system. I've concocted this level with lotso chicken & gravy and a little slice of Grandma's love. I tried my best to keep a balance between frame rate and detail but, if you're playing this on a 486, Good God!, you are in for the NES aggravation disorder.... (deep in your brain, the trauma inflicted by 8 bit hell is now resurfacing. the slowdown you are now remembering from your Nintendo days is clawing at your sanity.) \\\-do you like girls? -no. -and why not? -they're silly. -but Juliet's not silly. -......no. LOVE THIS LEVEL!!!! IF IT WAS SINGLE, I'D LET CHICKEN BOY DATE IT!!!!! ADDITIONAL CREDITS TO:Tyson Brown; for lots of help and selling me his Argyle Park CD after Turd ran off with my only copy. (if you like industrial,you must hear this! if you want to track down an address then write Argyle Park's label "R.E.X." bitch them out for not making enough copies. people want it and can't get it!!!!! PLAY INFORMATION* Your mother ate my dog! EPISODE AND LEVEL NUMBER:Huh? Jesus! it's Derick! He's gone ape shit! SINGLE PLAYER: !!!!!!!yes!!!!!!! A RARE ONE!!!! -So...You found your Dad's old stag movies eh? Is it the one with the donkey and the chambermaid? DUKEMATCH LEVEL: Only If You Use "BADTSTDM.MAP" Capable of 8 players. DIFFICULTY SETINGS:Not Implemented. SPANK MY MONKEY! NEW GRAPHICS:No, but I just bought some cereal and it makes me giddy. NEW SOUND FX:No, But My Goodness, I Would If I could! NEW MUSIC:Please see stupid reply above. -the next time i write i write in this diary mother will be dead. how odd. yet how pleasing. CONSTRUCTION* BASE:New Level From Scratchin my ass. Naa..The head shot's the only true stopper! EDITOR(S) USED: BUILD!!! Builds everything but a bigger penis for poor old Smokin' Pete!! cheer up stubby!!! KNOWN BUGS:Not any that I or my peon playtester slaves have found. If you find any, then PISS ON YOU, PUNY MORTAL!!HAHAHAHA! BUILD TIME:A Very Long Time Compared To Most People I Suppose. everyone says they make maps in a few days to a couple of weeks but i don't know how they do it. As i type this I have spent a little over a month on this level. that includes learning what the hell i was doing in the first place. WHERE TO GET THIS MAP FILE* No pick up the monkey, you no get the big FTP SITES: dollars. BBS NUMBERS: OTHER: *****HEY KIDDIES! IT'S TIME FOR ALL THE PERMISSION SHIT!!!***** PLEASE DO NOT USE THIS LEVEL AS A BASE FOR ANOTHER LEVEL. LOVE IT, HAVE SEX WITH IT, FEED IT APPLESAUCE, AND WIPE IT'S BOTTOM BUT DON'T MODIFY IT FOR USE AS A NEW MAP. PLEASE DISTRIBUTE THIS MAP FILE IN EVERY WAY KNOWN TO MODERN MAN!!! SEND IT EVERYWHERE!! BUT YOU MUST SEND THIS TXT FILE WITH IT!!! YOU MAY DISTRIBUTE THESE FILES IN ANY ELECTRICAL FORM (diskette,BBS, CD,WHATEVER!) JUST DON'T MODIFY THE MAP OR THE TXT FILE, OR YOU WILL BE HUNTED DOWN BY A MILLION SLOBBERING, HUNGRY BUTT HUMPERS FROM HELL!!!!! You Have Been Warned. BUT PLEASE, SEND THESE FILES TO EVERYONE FROM BILL CLINTON TO TRENT REZNOR. HELL, YOU CAN EVEN PUT IT IN A COMPILATION IF YOU WANT!! JUST REMEMBER THE ABOVE GUIDELINES AND REGULATIONS THERE MISTER!!! ooh! I got meself a pair of socks! THERE'S NOTHING OVER HERE WHY ARE YOU EVEN LOOKING? --> IF YOU WANNA PESTER CHICKEN BOY, DIAL:(816) 361-0683 THAT'S IT DADDY-O NOW BUGGER OFF. chicken boy is my pal. he makes me laugh. -did you not know you were sitting on his head. -i felt something, but i thought it was my hemmorroids. @@@@@@@@@@ LAST MINUTE UPDATE ON BADTASTE MAP @@@@@@@@@@ HOME OF THE PORNO MULTIPLEX THEATRE! It would appear that we have found some bugs... 1: Elevator in sewage system will automatically take you to the upper floor without you having to push the space bar. If you are on the upper floor and getting on to go down, press the space bar to bring the elevator up first. If you try to walk off the edge and just drop down, the elevator will catch you and automatically bring you back to the upper floor. I don't know what is wrong so I compensated for it in a cute little way! 2: If you shoot the lights in the theatre lobby the pools of light on the lobby floor will still be there. Don't know why that didn't occur to me in the first place. 3: Some theatre screens can be shot and they will explode like a t.v. that wasn't intentional. 4: Incase you don't notice on your own there are aliens in this map who are big followers of Chicken Boy. There is one shitting in a water fountain, one squatting over a bathroom sink, and one takin' a dump in a urinal! 5: There is also a guy either pukin' in or drinkin' from a urinal (you decide). He can't be killed. This was on purpose. Shoot the urinal and watch him drink pee pee water...hee...hee..hee 6: There is a room with a small fish tank and a creepy child sodomizin' shark inside. Actually I haven't personally seen this paticular shark sodomize any children, but you know, people talk. Maybe he just got a bad rap or somethin... Anyway, this shark loves to float around the room in mid air when you shoot the glass out of the fishtank. I know he's a cute little bugger, but don't pet him. He may very well be the cause of Smokin' Pete's stubby peter. I didn't fix this bug because, quite frankly, I like flying sharks. I'd get drunk with them and go camping if they were just slightly more friendly. 7: The reactor will continue to make noise even after it is blown up. I never did figure out how to fix that problem. It troubled me for a long time. If it bothers you so, then dance in circles while wanking and eating macaroni and beatle grub. nuff said. I WANTED TO ADD MANY MORE SPECIAL EFFECTS TO THIS LEVEL,BUT I MUST BE A SIMPLETON. I HAVE NO CLUE AS HOW TO IMPLEMENT MANY OF THE SPECIAL EFFECTS IN THIS GAME. THE ONES I DID INCLUDE WERE DONE THROUGH MUCH TRIAL AND ERROR. -I don't know what kind of sick shit you're in to, but I want those things buried! ALAS, THIS BE THE END OF THIS DOCUMENT, AND THERE BE NO MORE... hopefully........... -I bet she takes it up the duff the first night! -hey...what's up the duff? -you're too little. you wouldn't understand! LINCOLN LOVELOG 1996 REMEMBER TO PESTER CHICKEN BOY (816) 361-0683 p.s. i'd let you pester Lezli for tasting her own butthole, but her father is some type of cop so i won't be giving out her number. although I'm sure Chicken Boy will........... he.he. PETER JACKSON IS THE HOLY SUPREME BEING. BOW DOWN. -say! isn't that the famous irish singer, Mary O'Lanza? -he's Italian dad. the world's greatest tenor! look at my pee pee. B========)